Empowering youth in and from government care in BC

How do I know if it's abuse?

People can be in abusive relationships with a family member or dating partner. Below are some warning signs of abuse. You may be in an abusive relationship if someone:

• Makes you feel humiliated, intimidated, or isolated through their words and actions.
• Stalks or follows you.
• Uses money to hold power over you.
• Uses texting or social media to bully, harass, or intimidate you.
• Pressures you with words or actions to engage in sexual activity you don’t want to do.

An abusive partner might:

• Puts you down or calls you names you don’t like.
• Tries to keep you away from your friends or family.
• Does not respect your “NO.”
• Threatens to harm you, him or herself, or others.
• Is physically or sexually forceful with you in any way.
• Tells you that you’re lucky anyone loves you.
• Hurts you and plays it off like a joke or like you made him or her do it.

An abused partner might:

• Make excuses for the abuser’s behaviour.
• Feel nervous talking when the abuser is nearby.
• Be sick more often and miss work or school.
• Try to cover his or her bruises.
• Feel sad, lonely, withdrawn, and afraid.
• Use drugs or alcohol to cope.
• Be told by family and friends that he or she is “not the same” or “acting differently.”

Watch and learn about abusive relationships.

I think I'm in an abusive relationship. What should I do?

I'm no longer in an abusive relationship. Can I still get support?

Yes. There are several support services for people who’ve experienced abuse:

• The BC Society of Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse provides individual and group counselling for self-identified male survivors.
• Battered Women’s Support Services provides support for self-identified female survivors of sexual abuse, and relationship violence and abuse.
• You can also find a counsellor.